We write first in blood and tears, then go over in ink.

“Mum, Can I Stay Over?”

My daughter wants to stay over at her friend’s home. “Why don’t you invite your friends over?” I asked (because it would be my opportunity to observe her friends up close). However, she said she does not want her friends to come to our house. Again, I felt sad. I wonder if she is ashamed of our simple five room flat in an old block. But it’s true that, even if she invited her friends to stay, there is no room to lay extra mattresses for them. If I had a condo, I could ask them to come over to play in the pool or barbecue. But I don’t.
Whenever I read testimonies by stay-home mums, they never regret their decisions to exchange corporate suits and salaries for time with their kids. This is from the mums’ viewpoint, but I wonder what their children think? Do they truly appreciate Mum’s constant presence (and nagging and tuition and soggy vegetables)? Or, honestly, would they prefer the better housing, extra allowance and gifts that come with Mum’s salary and guilty conscience?  Now that my older two are reaching their teenage years, the issue is no longer about Mum’s quality time, it’s about their peers.
But how? If I could turn back the clock, I would still have made the same decision to stay home. I would not deny my husband his 12 years serving on staff in church and I would not deny God his service while he was in his prime. So, now, we live on a single income in a modest flat. It’s all right for me. But I wonder what my husband and my daughters think.
I pray that, hemmed in left and right by ipod-toting peers getting $50 allowance a week and shopping in Ion Orchard on weekends, the girls will seek God’s counsel and find a firm footing in His destiny for them.

Say hullo before you go :)

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